Corporate Event, Bus Tour or Car Crash?

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Tears, Tours and Tantrums: Last Night’s Apprentice Angst

Last night’s episode of the Apprentice was a lesson in knowing when to keep your gob shut. And the two who failed miserably on this particular score were Tenacity project leader Dan (despite bragging he was an expert in corporate events) and surprise, surprise James. Interestingly both are from the school of market trading (a sector of sales which has never been comfortable with that particular edict).

Dan failed miserably in this lesson because even when his entire team turned against him and accused him of failing to organise or lead them – and indeed failing to make any ticket sales at all – he insisted he’d done nothing wrong and that Tenacity had won the task anyhow.  Talk about taking nothing on board.

James’s failure was his usual selling stuff as cheap as chips (asking for an 80 per cent discount at posh Hever Castle was a big ‘no-no’ for starters). Worse still though was his singing – and, god forbid, his insistence that the guests on his high class bus tour should join him in a chorus of ‘The Wheels on the Bus’ and ‘ One Man Went to Mo.’ We here at Accolade Events cringed along with Karen at the time whom we bet wished she could get off at the next stop. And we’re certain she wasn’t the only one who felt the same way. Personally we wondered why no-one chucked him off the bus when they had the chance.

Which brings us to our next point. How come James didn’t get fired? Sure Jemma was the worst tour guide we’ve seen this side of Disney. She had to constantly refer to her notes and at one point took pains to mention Anne Boleyn’s marriage chest, telling the guests that it was worth seeing “if you can find it.” Then there was her classic line that Anne and Henry had “grown apart.” See, that’s what happens when you play truant during school History lessons Sometimes those missed lectures really do come back to bite you on the bum in adult life.

Dan was certainly a poor project leader tonight – to the extent that everyone in his team looked for guidance from handsome and competent Aussie Mark instead. And if Tenacity had been brought back into the boardroom last night we feel certain it would have been Dan who’d have been rolling his wee suitcase towards the waiting taxi instead.

But former bank manager Sanjay never did himself any favours either as leader of Summit. Not only did he fail to cost the project properly, but he seemed to be more of a sidekick to James than the man in charge. But then that was probably due to the fact that no-one can get a word in when James is around anyway. And despite the latter’s efforts to the contrary he really isn’t funny, amusing or entertaining. We just wish someone would sit him down and tell him. Admittedly some of the others such as smart Irish accountant Roisin are beginning to – but will it ever get through? Unfortunately we seriously doubt it.

And so it was blonde dancer Jemma who had to bid farewell to her baying housemates tonight – or would have had she got the chance. Happily she now has plenty of time to go and get some decent make-up advice. Take a tip from us – natural is nicer Jem!

Looking to host a Corporate Event? Find out how you and your colleagues can get involved in your own Apprentice-style event at our website www.accoladeevents.co.uk